After deciding to dissolve your marriage, you and your spouse need to start discussing divorce-related matters. These include finances, living arrangements, co-parenting if you have kids and business interests if you have a business.
So, how can you successfully handle conversations?
Choose a communication method
You and your spouse should agree on the modes of communication to use going forward. For instance, email for non-urgent matters, text messages for urgent, brief updates, phone calls for emergencies and specialized apps for high-conflict scenarios.
If you have kids, you can have brief face-to-face meetings during exchanges. In-person meetings can also be convenient when discussing property division in a low-conflict situation.
Note that written communication creates a record. Such documentation can be used in court when needed.
Set ground rules
It can be beneficial to set boundaries concerning communication. For example, agree on the topics to discuss and choose when to have discussions. Doing this can save you from talking about subjects not related to divorce or contacting each other at inconvenient times.
Use the BIFF method
The BIFF (brief, informative, friendly and firm) communication strategy is designed to manage high-conflict interactions. It works in divorce by putting focus on facts and co-parenting matters.
When sending your spouse a message or response, ensure that your message is short, strictly sticks to facts, has a polite tone and sets clear boundaries.
Avoid involving third parties
You and your spouse should avoid passing messages to each other using third parties, such as family, friends or even your children. Not only can this lead to distorted information, but it can also draw them into the legal battle, as they may be subpoenaed to testify or provide evidence regarding conversations.
Communication is critical when going through a divorce. Learn more to avoid potential conflicts with your soon-to-be ex-spouse.